Следующие инструкции помогут вам начать работу
UPDATE Table_2 t2u
SET first_id = (
SELECT t2.first_id
FROM Table_2 t2
INNER JOIN Table_1 t1 ON t1.id = t2.first_id
INNER JOIN (
SELECT parent_id = MAX(parent_id), email
FROM Table_1
GROUP BY
email
) t1p ON t1p.email = t1.email
INNER JOIN Table_1 t1i ON t1i.email = t1p.email
AND t1i.parent_id = t1p.parent_id
WHERE t2u.first_id <> t1i.id)
Тестовый скрипт (SQL Server)
;WITH Table_1 (id, parent_id, email) AS (
SELECT 1, NULL, NULL
UNION ALL SELECT 2, NULL, NULL
UNION ALL SELECT 3, 1, 'joe@m.ru'
UNION ALL SELECT 4, 2, 'bob@f.ly'
UNION ALL SELECT 5, 1, 'bob@f.ly'
UNION ALL SELECT 6, 2, 'kira@.us'
)
, Table_2 (id, first_id) AS (
SELECT 1, 3
UNION ALL SELECT 2, 4
UNION ALL SELECT 3, 5
UNION ALL SELECT 4, 6
)
SELECT t2.*, t1i.id as [update with]
FROM Table_2 t2
INNER JOIN Table_1 t1 ON t1.id = t2.first_id
INNER JOIN (
SELECT parent_id = MAX(parent_id), email
FROM Table_1
GROUP BY
email
) t1p ON t1p.email = t1.email
INNER JOIN Table_1 t1i ON t1i.email = t1p.email
AND t1i.parent_id = t1p.parent_id
WHERE t2.first_id <> t1i.id
Вывод
id first_id update with
----------- ----------- -----------
3 5 4