Вам необходимо пройти по иерархии в обоих направлениях:
DECLARE @ID int = 1;
WITH VTE AS(
SELECT *
FROM (VALUES(1,3),
(2,1),
(3,11),
(4,2),
(5,4),
(6,1),
(7,8),
(8,9),
(9,NULL),
(10,NULL),
(11,NULL))V(RowID,FK_RowID)),
Children AS(
SELECT V.RowID,
V.FK_RowID
FROM VTE V
WHERE V.RowID = @ID
UNION ALL
SELECT V.RowID,
V.FK_RowID
FROM Children C
JOIN VTE V ON C.RowID = V.FK_RowID),
Parents AS(
SELECT V.RowID,
V.FK_RowID
FROM VTE V
WHERE V.RowID = @ID
UNION ALL
SELECT V.RowID,
V.FK_RowID
FROM Parents P
JOIN VTE V ON P.FK_RowID = V.RowID)
SELECT RowID
FROM Children
WHERE RowID != @ID
UNION ALL
SELECT RowID
FROM Parents
WHERE RowID != @ID;